I asked AI to write two articles for DigitallyDownloaded.net: It failed. Horribly.

“We’re screwed. Writing is over. That’s it. It’s time to pack away your quill, your biro, and your shiny iPad: The computers will soon be here to do it better.”

This quote came from a writer for The Spectator, and it was in an article talking about the explosive growth of AI writing tools. In it, the author expressed a perceived inevitability that such tools are going to be a replacement for journalism and other professional writers.

Now, I am not for a second surprised that someone that gets paid to publish in a trash rag as bereft of intellectual rigour as The Spectator might worry about their job. Writers that are incapable of doing much more than regurgitating the rhetoric of a certain bias (far right-wing nuttery, in that case) can indeed be replaced by AI.

To give that writer some credibility, cadet journalists should genuinely be worried. For those that aren’t aware of how career paths in the media go, when you’re just starting out, you’re given very simple, rote tasks to complete. For example, when I was in my first year of journalism, I was on a business IT publication, and my job was largely to write up summaries about products and other simple things for the magazine. These things can be done by AI, as publications like CNET are already demonstrating. That role wouldn’t have needed me today, and I may well have never been hired. This is concerning, as it suggests that the pathway into journalism is being severely undermined and yet, at some point, we do need a new generation of journalists to come through.

Journalists in cash-strapped segments of the media should also be worried. AI writing tools are functionally free, and journalists cost money. When your business model is desperately trying to play the SEO game to get enough eyeballs on your content that the ad revenue covers the cost, AI is going to become very appealing as a cost-efficiency measure. Sadly, this does include the games media. There aren’t many publications that can afford quality even if they would like to, so games writers, critics and journalists will find it incrementally harder to find work.

However – and this is important – this is a far cry from the entire writing profession being under some existential threat as that Spectator writer seems to think. There are many forms of writing, journalism, and content production that AI cannot, now or ever, threaten. Even in the games space, for those writers and publications that are willing to be genuinely different, AI will not be able to muscle in. There might be fewer publications and fewer journalists that can survive this way, but there will be a role for them. The reality behind this is simple: AI cannot ever actually think. It can only ever aggregate. While AI can get very good at the latter (and indeed already is), the lack of insight that comes out of AI “writing” is painfully obvious for anyone that is actually paying attention.

To put it more bluntly – if you’re involved with a publication that sits outside of the mainstream, the aggregate nature of AI means that it will never be able to do what your publication does. Without trying to sound too arrogant, this is the position DDNet is in, and subsequently, AI would never have a role on this website for reasons that are about to become very clear. The aggregate of ideas that are fed into an AI model to “teach” it “how to think” might be fine for ripping information off the Internet to give people a “guide” on the best team in the newest Pokemon (for example), but, at a high enough level of writing, it’s the insights, not the thesis, that distinguishes an article and makes it worth reading.

I’ll give you two examples that I asked ChatGPT to generate: one serious, one fun, but both of which subjects that I like to think I’ve distinguished myself over, and hold a position well outside the mainstream on.

The first is the subject of Call of Duty and propaganda. That’s a topic that most people who read this site understand I am deeply and enduringly critical of. I asked ChatGPT to produce a 1,000-word article on whether Call of Duty is propaganda and why this is concerning from a broader cultural perspective. This is what the AI spat out:

On why Call of Duty is military propaganda, and why this is a concern in video games

Call of Duty, the popular first-person shooter video game franchise, has been criticized for its depiction of military conflict and its potential to be seen as military propaganda. The game portraysals of modern warfare in a highly-realistic manner, with players taking on the role of soldiers in various armed conflicts around the world. While the game has been praised for its cinematic storytelling and engaging gameplay, some argue that its portrayal of war and military violence can have a negative impact on players and the wider gaming community.

One of the main criticisms of Call of Duty is that it glorifies and sanitizes the reality of war. The game often portrays war as a thrilling, action-packed adventure, rather than the brutal and devastating reality that it is. This can create a distorted view of war for players and make it seem like a desirable, exciting option for young people. Additionally, the game often portrays the military in a highly-positive light, depicting soldiers as heroic and noble figures who are always fighting for freedom and democracy. This can create a sense of militarism and a bias towards military solutions to problems, which can be harmful in real life.

Another criticism of Call of Duty is that it can be seen as a form of recruitment tool for the military. The game often showcases advanced military technology and equipment, as well as the skills and abilities required to operate them. This can make the military seem like an attractive and glamorous option for players, especially young people. Additionally, the game often depicts military service as a noble and heroic endeavor, which can further fuel a desire to join the military.

Moreover, the portrayal of certain cultures, countries and entities in Call of Duty can be considered as problematic. The game often depict them as the enemy and as the ones who are oppressing the innocent, this can perpetuate harmful stereotypes and biases. This can create a sense of mistrust and hostility towards these groups, which can be harmful in real life and can lead to real-world consequences.

Another issue with Call of Duty is that it can desensitize players to violence and aggression. The game often depict intense and graphic violence, including the killing of innocent civilians. This can make players more comfortable with violence and aggression in real life, which can be harmful to themselves and others. Additionally, the game often depict war as a game or a sport, which can make it seem like violence is acceptable and even desirable.

Lastly, the Call of Duty franchise can be seen as a form of cultural imperialism. The game’s depiction of war and military conflict often reflects the perspective and interests of the United States and its allies. This can create a sense of cultural hegemony and a bias towards Western values and interests, which can be harmful in real life.

In conclusion, while Call of Duty is a popular and critically acclaimed video game franchise, it has been criticized for its depiction of military conflict and its potential to be seen as military propaganda. The game’s portrayal of war and military violence can have a negative impact on players and the wider gaming community, by glorifying and sanitizing the reality of war, creating a sense of militarism, desensitizing players to violence, perpetuating harmful stereotypes, and promoting cultural imperialism. It’s important for gamers and game developers to be aware of these issues and to consider the potential real-world consequences of their games.

There are so many issues with this, but first and forefront there is a lack of anything written there being substantiated. As an editor, if a journalist put this on my desk, I’d send it back with a warning note, demanding citations, sourcing and links. But that’s not even the biggest issue I have with it. The biggest issue is that when you drill down into it, there’s not a single unique insight in there, and it is written in the most boring, bland and unengaging manner.

I have covered this subject several times at DDNet. For a few examples: in one instance I shared an anecdote about the similarities I found between Call of Duty (and other wargames), and the military propaganda art that I found so chilling when I observed it in a Japanese art gallery. The aesthetics, tone, and theme of both “the enemy” and “the good guys” was a galvanising moment for me and made me realise all-too-keenly the damage that propaganda does to the national psyche. Another time I used a review of a Call of Duty game to provide a summary of the war crimes, coups, and other internationally villainous activities that America has got up to that the series simply ignores. That wasn’t a conventional review by any means, but in my view, the only way to handle a game that was so insultingly blatant with how it presented its themes. With a third article I drew comparisons to the military propaganda that Disney produced through World War 2 to encourage recruitment, and highlight the insidious effect that leveraging entertainment for propaganda has on a population.

Again, without trying to sound too arrogant here, I’m a decent journalist, and all of this is what a decent journalist should be doing. They should be finding unique and interesting ways to frame an argument, actively advocating for a position (when authoring opinion-based features), and then substantiating those opinions with reliable sources. AI would never be able to write one of these kinds of essays. There aren’t enough articles on the Internet along these lines to feed into it to be so “creative.”

What the AI produced is no more than a passive summary of the most mainstream view on the subject. Without a doubt, the AI writes more technically proficiently than I do. When I was drafting the book that I authored a few years ago my editor would send my drafts back filled with red lines. That was for a good reason, and I assure you all that I know my weaknesses as a writer. However, as a journalist where my talents lie and what I produce is something that AI could never do. The AI summarises, but I contribute.

Next, we move on to the fun article. As everyone knows, I like my digital waifu. A lot. Fan service works wonders on me. However, there is a serious side to this. I (and DDNet) have a distinct voice, and it’s my (our) own, and people know and recognise me (us) for it. Like my work or not (and I know there are plenty of people that fall into both groups there), my ability to reel off a list of top 10 waifu is a part of my branding (and, by extension, DDNet’s).

So I asked the AI to do my job and create a very “DDNet article”; a list of the ten most beautiful Japanese game characters. Here we go:

The ten most beautiful Japanese game characters

It’s no secret that the gaming industry has a plethora of attractive characters, and Japan, being one of the biggest players in the gaming market, has no shortage of its own sexy characters. From the powerful and confident to the cute and innocent, these characters have captured the hearts of gamers all over the world. In this article, we will be taking a look at the top 10 sexiest Japanese game characters.

1. Tifa Lockhart from Final Fantasy VII: Tifa Lockhart, the female protagonist of Final Fantasy VII, is known for her strong and independent personality, as well as her stunning beauty. Her design, which features a combination of athletic and feminine features, has made her a fan favorite among gamers.
2. Kasumi from Dead or Alive: Kasumi, the main protagonist of the Dead or Alive series, is known for her graceful and elegant fighting style, as well as her stunning beauty. Her design, which features a combination of traditional Japanese and modern Western influences, has made her a fan favorite among gamers.
3. Samus Aran from Metroid: Samus Aran, the main protagonist of the Metroid series, is known for her powerful and skilled fighting style, as well as her stunning beauty. Her design, which features a combination of high-tech armor and feminine features, has made her a fan favorite among gamers.
4. Lara Croft from Tomb Raider: Lara Croft, the main protagonist of the Tomb Raider series, is known for her adventurous and determined personality, as well as her stunning beauty. Her design, which features a combination of rugged and feminine features, has made her a fan favorite among gamers.
5. Morrigan Aensland from Darkstalkers: Morrigan Aensland, a character from the fighting game series Darkstalkers, is known for her seductive and flirtatious personality, as well as her stunning beauty. Her design, which features a combination of traditional Japanese and Western influences, has made her a fan favorite among gamers.
6. Mai Shiranui from King of Fighters: Mai Shiranui, a character from the fighting game series King of Fighters, is known for her flirtatious and seductive personality, as well as her stunning beauty. Her design, which features a combination of traditional Japanese and Western influences, has made her a fan favorite among gamers.
7. Kasugano Sora from Yosuga no Sora: Kasugano Sora, the main protagonist of the visual novel game Yosuga no Sora, is known for her innocent and cute appearance, as well as her stunning beauty. Her design, which features a combination of traditional Japanese and Western influences, has made her a fan favorite among gamers.
8. Talim from Soul Calibur: Talim, a character from the fighting game series Soul Calibur, is known for her graceful and elegant fighting style, as well as her stunning beauty. Her design, which features a combination of traditional Filipino and Japanese influences, has made her a fan favorite among gamers.
9. Ayane from Dead or Alive: Ayane, a character from the Dead or Alive series, is known for her powerful and skilled fighting style, as well as her stunning beauty. Her design, which features a combination of traditional Japanese and Western influences, has made her a fan favorite among gamers.
10. Chun-Li from Street Fighter: Chun-Li, a character from the fighting game series Street Fighter, is known for her powerful and skilled fighting style, as well as her stunning beauty. Her design, which features a combination of traditional Chinese and Western influences, has made her a fan favorite among gamers.

In conclusion, these are just a few of the many sexy Japanese game characters that have captured the hearts of gamers all over the world. From the powerful and confident to the cute and innocent, these characters have a wide range of personalities and designs that make them stand out. Each of these characters has their own unique charm and appeal that makes them attractive to different types of gamers. Whether it’s their fighting style, their personality, or their design, these characters have left a lasting impression on the gaming industry and continue to be popular among fans.

Now I must admit that I’m rather impressed that the algorithm has been fed so well that it would spit out something as obscure as Kasugano Sora. I was also surprised that the AI actually got the right SoulCalibur character. However, less impressive was including the decidedly not-Japanese Lara Croft on the list. Even aside from that rather significant factual error, though, this “article” is terrible content factory stuff. Firstly, the AI is only really capable of summarising facts about these characters (such as the highly repetitive statements like “a combination of traditional XXXX and XXXX influences in the design”), and is unable to put forward an opinion on aesthetics (which is rather important to this particular subject). Secondly, there’s no unique voice or consistency in this, whatsoever. It’s a list of the characters that pull up on Google more often than others.

An actual human that writes this list would, rather than simply reel off the “main character” in each list, have minor characters that are their favourites, even if they’re not so popular overall (like I do with, say, Marie Rose). That gives the list personality and the people reading it something different to think about (as much as a person “thinks” about the most beautiful characters, anyway). The author would also bend the “rules” of their own silly games to have fun with the list. Yes, Hatsune Miku isn’t technically a video game character, and thus avoids this AI’s notice, but you all know that I would have had Hatsune Miku on my own list. The list would have jokes and anecdotes (especially if it was self-aware, as any “hottest character” list really should be in 2023), and combined, this is what makes the thing worth reading on any level. The AI “article” has none of that.

So, getting back to the point here. Yes, AI will concern journalists that are so inferior in their work that all they’ll ever be able to do is peddle propaganda for The Spectator. It’s a threat to them because it’s very easy to feed a bunch of “Che Guevara was so bad” articles to an AI and have it write endless variations of those talking points. They’ll be as accurate as a list of Japanese characters with Lara Croft on it, but publications like The Spectator never cared for accountability or accuracy so that’s not going to save journalists from the AI-driven axe, either. AI will also make it hard for journalists that haven’t yet honed their craft to have developed a unique voice. If your job is simply to produce lists for the purposes of clickbait… well, the AI did technically do that here.

There’s no doubt that AI will be disruptive to the way that humans do their writing, in short. However, it annoys me when people talk up AI as though it is capable of entirely replacing humans. Just as AI “art generators” spit out images that are inherently derivative and uninspired (for all their technical detail), AI writers aren’t going to add anything to our global collective intelligence. All they’ll do is continue to repackage and repurpose the ideas that humans have already had. To us writers that will be frustrating because, at the lower end of town we’ll lose work opportunities to clueless CEOs, marketing managers, editors and publishers that lack the inspiration themselves to see the limitations of AI. But long-term I honestly believe that when the dust settles, people are going to realise that AI is a vacuum that contributes nothing in return. Journalists and writers that are capable of thinking beyond automation, will continue to find people that value their work.

That, or humanity will slip into a tech-driven dark age. This is also entirely possible, but since humanity won’t survive much longer after doing that, it’s not something to be concerned about either (just for very different and nihilistic reasons beyond the scope of this article).